Ancient Wisdom: Technology

I'm backdating my original copyright date on this post after checking the release date of the video it parodies. I parodied a lot of library videos that year, most of which ended up broadcast as fraud on TV shows. Good day and welcome to Ancient Wonders. I'm Peter Newton. Recent excavations have uncovered evidence of ancient technology that was once considered exclusive to the modern age. Most of these ancient breakthroughs were applied to the sciences of war and of swindling visitors to the temple out of donations. Archimedes was the first to harness the power of the Sun, as he successfully defended his island from an invading Roman fleet. Instructing soldiers to reflect sunlight in the direction of the invasion force with polished metal shields, he set the Roman vessels ablaze. The Romans quickly learned from this lesson and made sure their next seaborne attack was at night. The ancient battlefield had aerial reconnaissance. Huge kites could carry an artist high enough to make accurate drawings of enemy positions and fortifications, as long as it was a windy day, though caution was exercised to keep the rope short enough to prevent him from flying too close to the Sun and ending up like Icarus. It appears that steam power was also harnessed first by the ancient Greeks. Rather than being used to drive motors, it was used to spin a giant whirling dervish in the Temple of Dionysus, the god of wine. Scientists were paid hush money to keep the technology secret. And if all that isn't enough, it appears that the Romans even had incendiary explosives, which are believed to have been inadvertently found in camel droppings through the processing of fertilizers. This invention hinged on the invention of the ancient flame thrower, which kept the discoverer at a safe enough distance to survive his discovery. By using flame throwers to ignite this substance in synchronicity with the gestures of their commander, the Tenth Legion convinced a whole army of barbarians that he was Thor, the Teutonic god of thunder. Terrified, the barbarians turned and fled. Much of this technology was lost by the burning of the Cleopatra's library. Had it survived and developed sooner, none of us might be left here to learn about it. For Ancient Wonders, I'm Peter Newton.
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