Imperial Torch: One Man's Trash

Good day and welcome to Imperial Torch. While the practice of genocide has grown unpopular, the establishment of global empires has traditionally depended on it. Before leading his army on a bloody campaign to expand the Roman empire's borders to the northern coast of Gaul, for instance, general Massacrus delivered the following instructions to his troops. 'Fighting men of the Imperial Thirteenth to the Seventeenth, you have been entrusted with a great responsibility. The gods have decided that there are too many barbarians in the world, especially on our frontiers. It is estimated that these woods may hold as many as three hundred thousand of them. While each of you has up to now managed to kill ten times your number on the battlefield, the time has come to extend your slaughter into barbarian homes. 'I know their children are cute, ambling through the meadows in their furry little hats. I'm a family man, myself. But when I line them up in columns of ten to be impaled like shish-kabob against my mighty lance, I take comfort in the knowledge that I'm sparing them the misery of growing up as orphans. If you really care about these youngsters, you'll follow my example. And don't fall for any meek, high voiced renditions of your favorite battle hymns either. Remember how that barbarian brat was caught defacing the emperor's statue? They'd probably do the same to your likeness. 'Now from among the barbarian women, you will be limited to capturing one slave per man - no more than what you can carry home on your shoulder. I know they fetch a high price at auctions, but corralling is strictly prohibited. The remaining ninety percent of these enemy breeders are to be concentrated into huts and burned en masse. Just think of them all as your mother-in-law...' The modern view is to be appalled by the berserk, hands on mass destruction of our ancestors. Today, the same results may be tidily achieved from altitudes ranging between five thousand and twenty thousand feet.
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© 2015. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.

Wilde on Absinthe

Narrator: After his release from Reading Gaol, Oscar Wilde embarked on a four month absinthe binge during which he coined some of his cleverest quips. (Background score by Dvorak. An absinthe bar, circa 1898. Wilde sits alone at his candlelit table for one. He pours himself a glass of green, translucent liquid, draws a spoonful of sugar, dips the utensil in the drink, pulls it out and sets it aflame. Inspired, he holds the burning spoon over his head like a torch.) Wilde: I'm the Statue of Liberty! Waiter: Please sit down, Mister Wilde. Narrator: By the fourth month, ostracized by society, Wilde sunk to the depths of nineteenth century depravity. (The absinthe bar. Holding a drink, Wilde approaches a table of women, one of whom sports a modest display of cleavage.) Wilde: Lady Mounds won't require a necktie. Mounds: I'll thank you to withdraw your intrusive glance, sir! Waiter: Please sit down, Mister Wilde. Narrator: See the wild side of Oscar Wilde on Wilde on Absinthe, a special collection of memorable utterances from the celebrated author, exclusively on High Brow Oligarchy.
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© 2007, 2015. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.

The Balogne Bulletin

Today on the Balogne Bulletin, public transit undergoes an overhaul. Seats will be done away with and replaced by more efficient cubicles. Though riders will be unable to sit down, the new plexiglass booths offer both improved security and solid back support. Authorities warn of a diabolical new street drug more potent than synthetic crack. Users report out-of-body experiences, hallucinations and discovering a strange rapport with plant life. A mentalist accuses science fiction programs of undermining his credibility by presenting his personal testimony as a far-fetched fantasy. Cornered by skeptics, he luminously dematerialized. The military has developed a bomb that massacres home dwellers and spares their homes. This will preserve the target region for occupation when its air becomes breathable again in a hundred years. To end happily, a German shepherd is being petted as the hero of a remarkable rescue. Unaided, the dog released a small child from captivity in a locked safe.
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© 2007, 2015. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.

The Smile-Rite Face Mold

(A subway train. A shapely woman drops something. As she bends over to pick it up, she looks behind her and sees a seated man smiling. Caught in her suspicious glare, his face turns red with embarrassment.) Narrator: Need some help with that smile? How do you know you're not making a fool out of yourself? Let the Smile-Rite face mold reshape your features into their most winning proportions. (The man in bed. He straps a heavy apparatus like a catcher's mask around his head before turning out the lights.) Narrator: Composed of a firm, durable alloy, Smile-Rite fits snugly around the head for comfortable sleeping and produces overnight results. (The next day on the train. The man sits across from the woman when a jolt of acceleration causes an elderly passenger to lose her balance and fall with a thump.) Woman: Oh no! I think she's hurt. (Seeing the man) Oh, look who's smiling! What are you, some kind of sadist? Man: (Smiling) Me? I'm not smiling. I'm paralyzed. Narrator: The Smile-Rite face mold. What a relief!
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Voices of Consequence: Joan's Own

Today on Voices of Consequence, in the fifteenth century, a humble shepherdess posing as a French maid is astonished when her innermost questions are miraculously answered by invisible voices. (The woman kneels alone in a Gothic cathedral.) Maid: If you know my future, then you must tell me how I am going to die. Echoing Voice: (Rising foremost over a rumbling choir) You're not going to like it. Maid: Please, I must know. Echoing Voice: All right, you asked for it. You will die of the plague. Your physician will try to save you by hacking off your infected body parts. You will grow smaller and smaller over a period of weeks, suffering excruciating pain, until you final succumb in abject horror. Maid: That's dreadful! Isn't there a faster way for me to die? (Indecipherable chatter as the choir takes a moment to gather a consensus.) Echoing Voice: Perhaps there is. How do you feel about being burned at the stake?
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© 2007, 2015. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.

The Balogne Bulletin

Today on the Balogne Bulletin, the government wants the news media to compile a hit list of conspicuous protesters. If you disagree with the move, we'd like to hear from you. Please include your name and home address with your correspondence. The results are inconclusive in an undercover marketing survey to confirm the precise demand for explicit sexual imagery on the internet. Numerous modem users were interviewed at home by their parents or spouses, at work by their employers, in the classroom by their teachers, even at church by their pastors, and all of them denied having visited any x-rated URL's. A privately funded think tank recommends increased spending on the space program. Figures project that extraterrestrial drilling will soon be necessary to maintain our supply of rocket fuel. In movie theaters, a new documentary called Pax Montana declares America as the new Roman empire with modern pop culture supplanting ancient myths. The film's author and narrator speaks in protracted, thundering syllables and claims to be a god. And as another holiday season approaches, police have redoubled their efforts to apprehend lawbreaking motorists. Only dangerous drivers who pass a strict roadside examination will be tolerated.
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© 2007, 2015. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.

YTNBC

I recalled most of the violations NBC shows committed with my blogs by their YouTube account from 2007 to 2010. As my memory failed of the precise content of my voluntarily erased original Blogger account, I was less able to recall the precise content of my former posts as I viewed one after the other on NBC's YouTube account, though I was able to look back on catching these violations online after I inadvertently rewrote them from my personal experience. Most of them are listed in my post: The Saturday Evening Post (Statements.)
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Right Side Up

It's probably around the right time for me to wish Americans a happy Thanksgiving. Happy Thanksgiving! Here in Canada, we've decided to start playing our Christmas music in the shopping centers. We like to get our consumers in the stores for the event as soon as possible. How many times have I been falsely accused of being incarcerated over the last year? Ten? Twenty? A hundred? I have never been arrested or incarcerated in my life. Is this the 'work' of a public relations firm sympathetic to one or more of the evil stars who committed all that music fraud and comedy fraud with my erased posts? Or is it just the unchecked malice of hundreds of culpable production workers who want to go back to their Crystalids crack heaven? I wonder what kind of a lawyer I will need to fight this kind of corporate crime. I may have heard it incorrectly, but I thought I heard one of my critics say that I am too 'happy' to be telling the truth about this vicious crime against my work and image. Sounds like one of the culprits may have miscalculated in how much of their Satanic abuse I am capable of withstanding. Another point that may escape him is that I have a clear conscience and it is very important to me. Unlike all these hateful stars that the TV made you worship by promoting them as the authors of my music and/or comedy, who care only about their careers, I care about the integrity of my soul. I guess that if I were like them, I would be a lot more depressed about what happened to me. Make sure you know who God is siding with in my dispute. His blessing won't be determined by who has more money or who has more fans; it will only determined by who has been telling the truth all these years. Who stands against the truth of an artist's ownership of his work? If the networks repent and admit their crimes and start to repair the harm they have caused to their victim, I won't be able to fault them, but as long as they stand with frauds against their victim, then as far as I'm concerned, they stand against God.
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Thinking Outside the Idiot Box

Hope my readers enjoyed that last post from Balogne. I think I'm finally starting to produce new and fresh work after inadvertently rewriting three seasons of TV content that were stolen out of my original account. Maybe now some of you are starting to warm up to the possibility that I have been telling the truth all along about those crooked TV networks and their dirty fraud. Once I establish ownership over my property, I guess I will have to battle to restore my image from all the damage caused by the evil lies spread in the population to 'justify' this horror committed against an innocent artist. Are they on TV pretending to be indignant? That seems to work well on gullible TV viewers. Well, as long as they have you looking at me like I'm on the ten most wanted list, I think it's only fair that I should tell you my side of their motives. They stole my work because I'm talented. They want their TV shows to be as well written as my blogs but they don't have my talent. They ganged up on me because I'm alone in the world. They are nasty predators. Most of all, I think, they made a mockery of my work because it is good. The evil hate the good. If they had to make a blood sacrifice to Lucifer to get their job on SNL, they would resent me even more for my strong faith God. I'll see what I can do about providing you with some sort of Saturday amusement if that's what you've become accustomed to. You sure won't get it from a bunch of hateful crooks who steal material from the internet and tell murderous lies about the author - at least not as long as I am online to defend my work against their sticky fingers.
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The Balogne Bulletin

Today on the Balogne Bulletin, the opening decades of the twenty-first century unveiled a technological milestone as modern mass communications enabled the entire world population to think and act simultaneously for the first time in history. At long last, we can all at once agree that we are deeply dissatisfied. A leading political pundit says that new anti-hate legislation is premature. Without anti-dishonesty legislation to back it up, liars can still get away with hate. 'The future is gamed,' says Clark Ravelston, president of ABNORM: the American Board of Neurotic Obsessions and Ridiculous Misapprehensions. Ravelston insists that super villains from the future have invaded the present with the evil aim of reversing our evolution. He warns that they gravitate towards nondescript, administrative occupations, drive imports, and may be detected by the prophetic accuracy with which they predict wars, disasters and champion thoroughbreds. Doom notwithstanding, gloomy weather may be behind the recent jump in suicides. As one casualty put it in his tragic note: 'I find the rain unbearable now that I am unemployed and divorced.' In sports, a public relations firm placed first in diving and a drunk won the gold medal in weight lifting at the 2015 Armchair Olympics. The victories drew howls of protest from seated spectators who felt more qualified to win those events.
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© 2007, 2015. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.

Break It Up

I don't like having to put down stars, but I have no choice. I liked the shows and bands that targeted me as much as any one else at first. See how they answered my love: by ganging up on me like pack animals and stealing volumes of my work. And now the TV wants you to think that it's okay to rip me off and trample all over my image. I tell you about a nightmare experience I had at a Madonna concert and it drives them to put Madonna on the TV and radio and in the supermarkets to discredit her victim. Why can't Madonna go back to the 1980's and stay there? And why can't the Rolling Stones go back to the 1960's and 70's? And why can't Saturday Night Live go back to the late twentieth century and stay there? They stole my songs and blogs so I'm unimpressed by their talent. And rather than worshiping celebrity cliques that conspire to commit outrageous crimes, I think we should at least be shunning them.
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The Fun Compressor

Is your playtime cutting into your recreation schedule? Are missing important cartoons? Why should it take 23 hours to set a high score? Put the fun compressor to work for you, digitally condensing hours of your real experiences into brief but intensely euphoric artificial samples. In no time, you'll have more time for just about everything. And all you'll want to do is use your fun compressor. Think of the thrilling new possibilities for blind dating alone. So fit it all in with the fun compressor, the indispensable new life organizer from the inventors of the data bank.
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© 2007?, 2015. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.

Conspiracy of Silence

I have a message today for network TV subscribers: when you watch TV these days, you're helping corporate criminals to get away with fraud. Networks currently support evil stars who were directly involved in the plot against me. The networks who shun me now wanted you to love assholes as though they were artists just for having illegal possession of my music and/or comedy. The networks want you to worship lies and they want you to reject truth. Don't expect network corporations to admit their fault. That's why I should be excused for my occasional flareups when I discuss networks or network staff. These pricks have fucked up my life so much that I can't stay awake longer than five minutes without contemplating suicide. I'm telling you the truth about that bitch Madonna. I fucking well know what I lived through when I worked on her show and so does everyone else who was there. What a fucking joke. Look at the thousands of posts the TV has stolen from me over the years. And now I find out that NBC merged with Microsoft in the 1990's to form MSNBC. That explains why my posts weren't safe on the fucking internet. Don't expect web corporations to admit their culpability either.
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Delightful Holidays

Hope I've done the right thing by sharing that last song. I wanted to offer my listeners a sense of completion. Delightful offers a compelling blend of musical intensity and lyrical cheer and follows 'Disenchanted' and 'Currents' as the climax of a musical trilogy. A good song to mark the approach of the holiday season. I'll be adding another chapter to my Chronology of Recordings for 2015 soon. I've had a pretty decent output after spending January to April working on cartoons.
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My Pleasure

I've shared another new song called Delightful. It belongs with Disenchanted and Currents. Nice melody to sit down and listen to on a rainy day, I think.
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Delightful

Profounder encounter Nature astounded her, white doves surrounding her By hope betrayed unwittingly Behaving too impulsively A brazen bid for primacy Niceties withdrawn Whimsy's staunch rival Will undeniable, strength yet revivable Propelling closely to your side Where heavenliness gratified To span the ranges far and wide Happiness forgone Amid high aspiration Weightless within in the arms of the wind As I approach her company No longer to hunger Perfectly wonderful, fruitful and bountiful Ascending to a lofty plain May never be as free again On places more sublime we'll train Grasping ever on Between calm and abandon Everything from a plum to a trifle Is as delightful as can be Feeling at least that feasting is rightful Among the sights I love to see
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© 2015. Words and music by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.

Disoriented

Good morning, friends! Yes, I know that I say I have no friends, but I only share this secret with my friends. Friends spend time together, right? That's the most important thing. Are you Chinese? So am I. I've lived in downtown Vancouver for over twenty years now. Bruce Lee is my idol. He was proud of achieving fame and fortune without compromising his beliefs, or 'being honest'. He disliked being called a star, saying that 'star is an illusion.' I know I'm not getting any younger, but Confucius didn't make it until he was fifty-two. Confucius had a gift for being able to accurately analyze individuals. When he shared his findings with them, it ended up holding back his progress in society. Few argue with his wisdom now. Have I ever told you about my family? I have six brothers and one sister. One more thing about Saturday's script, when I poked fun at the web, I was thinking mostly of the depravity of the online offenses against my poetry, scripts, and music, often committed by TV stars on their web pages. Well, I better go get some chow. See ya later!
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Hungry for Justice

I can't even go into a supermarket to buy food anymore. Last time, they made me listen to both Madonna and Coldplay. So I have to find another way to eat. This is really shameful. [4:35pm] Cable TV's MTV has sort of ruined my life. Its image based music gave way to the criminal motive of putting my music in the hands of performers with a more 'appropriate' image. This kind of specious reasoning received far less support before MTV came out. Back then, business would have considered it too much of a gamble to invest in music fraud on the scale of what was stolen from my 2007 online repertoire and broadcast on MTV (now more or less restored to my name, I hope). Speaking of music, I hope everyone has heard my last two song posts, Disenchanted and Currents. While I am always struggling to improve my recordings, I can say with confidence that my music listeners got more of a thrill from hearing these new songs from me than they did from watching Madonna on TV. I think my readers and listeners come to me because they are under-stimulated. The fantastic images of bullshit stars are not enough to make up for an appalling lack of talent. Don't worry about me being 'rejected'. In a world without honor, being a reject is the only honorable course. One last note about my scripts, I noticed that Endgame came out in 2007. If so, I may have used it to help me author a script similar to yesterday's Bologne Bulletin in 2007. If I did, Saturday Night Live would have stolen it. So if you saw some of it on Saturday Night Live, now you know who really wrote it.
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The Balogne Bulletin

Maybe this will help my readers see how my content would have been prized by the writers of SNL's 'Weekend Update'. Good afternoon. Today on the Balogne Bulletin, the government says we must reduce our urban population by eighty percent. Responsible city dwellers are urged to volunteer for official resettlement, a program offering free rail service. The rise in supernatural disasters around the world may be due to the internet. A geological investigation can find no other cause for last week's hail of fire and brimstone. As online content approaches apocalyptic levels of depravity, citizens trapped indoors must limit their recreation to watching DVD's. An ambitious new regulation has been added to the labor code. From now on, only workers who submit to being implanted with a microchip will enjoy full job security - until a flashing red light appears on their foreheads, indicating termination. Turning to celebrity news, a prominent actor says he was 'just acting' when he committed perjury. Charged with trafficking in white slavery, he says he felt free to fabricate his testimony on the grounds that most of his victims were asian. And a health committee has made it mandatory for drivers to become organ donors. Accused of backstabbing, the committee chairman responded by saying that it takes guts to make people do the right thing.
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© 2007, 2015. Scripts by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.

Currents Mindset

I thought I should add a few more minutes of music for my music listeners. It will help them to listen less to the radio. My new song Currents is fun to play and offers much for exotic dancers who like improvising to colorful, poetic imagery. Did you have your Friday the 13th bad luck yet? I forgot to bring something with me on the way here and had to turn around halfway. I figure I'm safe now. Friday the 13th is actually a better than average day for me usually.
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Currents

None would seek a world so bleak Endless hardships forced upon them Feeling like a child unwanted Lifeless as a stone Best to face with passing grace Raising high the gleaming standard To a myth unduly pandered And a truth unknown Striking out from every gate besieged Unencumbered by the creeping vine Wait sedately for the course to turn Dispossession but a small concern Her back shows all she knows Though stately legs strut towards me Eager to again reward me One more shun for favours done Take away the stranger's pleasure In the name of fun Then by passion am I more consumed To indulge in an inspired whim Blazing brightly to a shorter end As the anguish laden clouds descend Unprepared for who was there Giving ground in sound condition By a switch of disposition Comes a halt to the assault Thwarted by feint recognition Of one who gave out love Change approaching as a sweeping tide Hand outstretching from the nimble frame She can take me where I want to go Where the sweetest of the currents flow Having guided to a higher plane Faith withdraws from the altered scene Softly stirring in a blurry hue And receding out of view
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© 2015. Words and music by David Skerkowski. All rights reserved.

One Track Mind

I'm going to suspend my sharing ban and release one of my offline songs today. I have more in reserve. I wanted to let my music subscribers know that I'm still active and looking forward to the beach party.
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Disenchanted

Form swirling freely, hard to resist Seems to exact no grave expenses Forced to consider what may yet exist Outside the limit of common senses Attracting the traveling eye Projecting a figure sly and elusive Alone on the sandy shore Amazed to have proven more intrusive Few would examine but from afar Pleasures aplenty for the taking Or see how empty things really are: Held up on wings of doubtful making She seizes upon the chance To dominate an expanse of vision The lesser inclined to fall Put up an enfeebled opposition Though outwardly all aglow Surpassing in looks and wishes granted Her promise is just for show And leaves the believer disenchanted Once straight around her, wise to have stayed Of reckless impulse independent Not to be counted among the dismayed Who feasted on handouts too resplendent A wild celestial ride Possessively shines astride the ocean Whose flickering lights forewarn The ultimate price of sworn devotion
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